"I hung up on you because I just didn't feel like talking to you anymore." |
It really is all just a big game. Intimacy, courting, and the whole idea of relationships as one searches for "the one" is an emotional and drama-filled journey most people go through during adolescence and early adulthood-- unless you're one of the few who falls into the idea of finding your "soulmate" during your teenage years, in which case you'll end up divorced by early adulthood and beginning the journey then.
But anyway, the whole concept of playing this dating game is senseless, yet we all seem to fall victim to it; there really is truth to the saying: "Nice guys finish last." Women like guys who aren't afraid of being slight assholes, even to them... why? Well for one it shows a sign of confidence, and on the other hand it provides an opportunity to be the "exception." Oh yes... everyone wants to be the exception to the rule. How great must it feel to know that you were the one to "change" your guy? That because of you, he has left his bad-boy ways behind?.. because you're different. The truth of the matter is that you're probably not different seeing as by definition, most of us are average. Most people fail to comprehend the fact that there are few outliers in the population. We're all of one species, and because of this commonality, we tend to behave similarly in various situations. Yes, we are all individuals with minds of our own, and many of us would love to think that we would never be in situations we hear about and criticize, but really, chances are that you will be, and you will behave as many people have in the past in different given situations.
This works both ways, which is why men love "challenges"-- or in blatant terms, virgins. It all stems back to our selfish, innate ways.
So why is the nice guy always the friend? The nice guy offers no challenge, offers no opportunity to boost your self-confidence because, well, he already does enough of that. Stupid? Yes. Like I said, it's a senseless game.
A friend of mine continues to "date," for lack of a better word, a guy who is completely out of her league (& I don't mean he's in a higher one). He has nothing to offer her (or many other people for that matter), has illustrated his complete carelessness for her time and time again, yet she continues to be "romantically" involved with him. It's like watching a marathon of Dumb & Dumber. After every episode, she suddenly becomes logical and realizes that all of the energy and time spent toward whateverthefuck their relationship is, is nothing but a vain attempt.
Another friend of mine had her pick between a guy who was completely head over heels for her, handsome, hard-working, family oriented, smart, romantic, with a bright future ahead of him, and a red-headed, not-so-soft-on-the-eyes-low-IQ-asshole who can be credited with the title of this entry-- guess who was more appealing.
Yet another friend, a 22 year old virgin (not because of inability but rather by choice) who has never been in a relationship, has endured a lifetime of being "the other woman" due to her top-notch taste in guys. It seems guys have a slight issue with her lack of "putting out," yet pursue her anyway in hopes of being the exception. It usually ends shortly thereafter when they realize they are not the exception, or when she finds out of their 2 year currently ongoing relationship. She's still confident that she will one day be stranded in a castle guarded by a ferocious dragon and be saved by the perfect male who will be dressed in tin and holding a sword. She's cute :)
And another well-known individual spent a year grieving over a guy who convinced her of the world and consequently went out and did his thing with every girl on campus while leaving her waiting until he was "ready" to once again be with her. Yeah, that one was about me.
In conclusion, I'm bitter and cynical.. just kidding.. kinda. I do still think the idea of falling in love exists, but not in the quantity people seem to think it exists in. I have hope that some of us will outgrow this phase of falling for assholes, and I think the rest of the population will eventually exhaust all their energy and just settle for one.
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Sarcasm makes up about 90% of my speech. I was born into a Catholic family and currently identify as none of the above. I've lived a sheltered life that I am currently in the process of de-sheltering. I love helping people, though I don't believe in the existence of altruism.
See my profile
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